feeling detector, pls invent it for me~

In the name of Allah The Most Beneficent The Most Merciful

salam.

saya terdengar lagu after all.

and it reminds me of how many times we ended up our relationship before this and then after that, he came back to me again and again.

he once said, "kalau saya lari ke mana-mana pun, saya akan blk pd awk blk...awk jgn risau..sbb awk dah set satu standard yg sgt tinggi utk mana2 perempuan tandingi"

but now, im thinking. is it still valid? the statement he made after our the-very last-worst-break up?

because on the last conversation, he said he felt nothing towards me. no love at all. what's left was only desire.

and because of that, i realize there's no way i will have chance to push him up to the extent anymore. that was the limit.

when everything started to fall apart, and he lost his love to me somewhere...i know this relation won't go anywhere.

and after that he did a series of actions that shows he really2 hate me@ blaming me for things that happened to us before.

how easy he changed his mind like a switch, and how i wish i could be like that too.

no, don't get me wrong.

i dont want him to ever come back again after what had happened to me. i have to go through one hell-ish year to overcome my inferior, my nightmares and all that. dealing with guilty, overdose of sadness, the increasing level of tense...etc2.

i learned alot from that. life lessons.

and i want to know, i really want to know how does it feel to fall in love at first sight? did it really happen? how to know it? how to know that it is a mutual feeling and the we're not just perasan-ing ourselves?

sigh.

killing 2 birds with 1 stone huh?

i still remember about him sometime. this feeling inside is growing stronger each time i met this mr f.

he did show something. but im just not sure yet. whether it is just concern because im a trainee (bdk br blaja) or he's feeling something inside?

saying jage diri@ take care, is it normal stuff in that company?

aiyooh.. hard to figure. if the person who's saying it an older man like my father or a pakcik2 (married man) surely i'll accept it as concern to me because im mcm ank2 die, something like that. but then, it's coming from a guy older only a year from me.

whether it is his nature to be such a sweet and concern guy to everyone (esp girl) sbb family upbringing mmg mcm tu, or is there some sparks between us?

too deep2. im thinking too deep. it's too early to predict things now. but what's more worst is that i already feel something the very first time i saw him on my first at the company. sigh.

nabila, focus!

ok, doing my report now~~~ ;(


Yours Truthfully,
Misz iNz