Hello there!
It is almost two months now ever since I have becoming a student here.
Student's Life
It was merely sorta escapism for me at first. The first time I decided to left my previous job and come back as a student mainly was due to my inability to breath and live the life I have had last time. It was so tiring. Mind and soul. My time was too limited, even for myself. Let alone for family and friends.
My focus was too broad and I was juggling day to day like a clown in a circus non-stop. Well, not that it was the worst of three years spent. But come to think of it, there were nothing significant I achieved for the past three years. Nothing that I can be proud of myself personally.
This is not about being riya' or takabbur but as normal human being, I am pretty sure that we have our own milestone at certain period marked in our life. (Though Allah is the Best Planner, still it should not stop us from planning what we think the best for ourselves; according to our limited experience, knowledge and wisdom)
And sadly, above all I am starting to forget how to express my thoughts and feelings in writings like before. It has become rusty nowadays. Yeah, why won't it be when you haven't practice 'em for some time. One year might be acceptable.
But three years? It's too much already.
Now that I finally realized that I did not properly craft the plan of my own life with concrete details. Since I am finding myself floating around and freely following what life has to offer to me. Completely.
Bad. Bad. Bad.
This honeymoon phase should ended by end of this October (if I am failing it again this week. Whoa. Contingency plan made now. lol)
Perhaps, I need to have my own personal life Gantt chart for my Master since this is a research based one.
Duh-uh.
High self discipline and motivation are needed during this phase. Morally, I think I need some support from my dearest loved ones too since the only person who can truly understands this project 'will only be me' and just me only. Oh, yeah, I forgot about my supervisor. But she can only guide me through it anyway.
I need to finish this successfully since I have already started it.
Love Life.
At first I was about to update on this topic. But come to think of it. Nay. Later on. It will be reflected personally in another place.
Just realized about 90% of my focus shifted on this area lately. Too much drama, I think. Probably I was too bored with recent life that a series of heart-breaking episodes keep on appearing to spice up this lifeless life of mine. ( What kind of phrase is that?)
Conclusion.
1. Adjustment period is still on going for me. But I need to re-evaluate back my current progress in life and my master specifically. I need to really confirmed where I am at the moment. Realistically.
2. Thinking twice and re-evaluate any actions or words spoken before proceed. This, needed me to think and feel outside my own shoes. Which honestly, quite hard. No. It IS hard. This is more on the relationship part with other people. Be it with acquaintances, BFF and Family.
3. Finding back the lost obsession and things that I truly love and enjoy doing. Cause I think I might have drop them one by one accidentally along this journey. I mean, when I was stuck working in the automotive industry.
4. This one is on progress. Inner self improvement. While for inter and intra-personal development are still in the planning side. Reflection and conclusion need to be made consistently at the end of the day to avoid any repetitive mishap
